Monday, November 17, 2014

success or failure...you decide!

the people around us play a huge factor in our success or our failure...
Choosing to be healthy is a TOUGH decision, one we must make every day.
Whether we fight high blood pressure, diabetes, heart disease or another health-related illness.  
Having to remove ourselves from "the pack" and be different is very hard to do.
It's easier to just blend and live life the easy way. 
If our family isn't aware of our personal struggles, it can make things twice as difficult to succeed.

I'm often asked from readers about helping their children.  

It's a fine line and a tough one to bring up with our children when it comes to their health. I was overweight and wanted things out of sight, out of mind always.  I never wanted to discuss weight loss or my weight because it was an exposure of my insecurities and if we didn't talk about it then it didn't exist in my mind.  It was just easier that way.  We often talk about US but what if it's not US and it's THEM?  Then it's a whole new problem that is often times difficult to deal with on so many levels.  
If a loved one struggles with their weight, it's not fair to "punish" the entire family, remove all junk food and start over or is it?  Depends on if we want success or failure for that person that we love...and honestly, it's always better to adapt a healthy lifestyle regardless of our physical appearance right?
Is it then fair to single out that child giving them their "special food" while others in the family are devouring chocolate pie?  NOT AT ALL.  
So where's the balance between long term success or constant failure?

I preach about things being tough going at a healthy lifestyle alone but honestly, it's darn near impossible without a support system.  While my workout group has one another, they still go home to their "normal lives" and we never know what that means unless we live it.  Are there temptations all around?  Do they have an overweight husband who struggles as much as they do?  Is their entire family unhealthy and overweight and they have yo-yo'd for most of their life? When you discuss healthy eating, will they take it as a time to starve and barely eat throughout the day knowing it's not healthy but it'll give them temporary and FAST results? 
A support group is KEY in their success or their failure.  If they have loved ones constantly making them feel guilty for exercising or watching what they eat, will they hit a breaking point and fold under the pressure?  Will that support group lift them up so much that they will find strength within the group to carry over to their personal lives, therefore leading them to helping others lead healthy lifestyles and be the example?  WOW, as a health educator we always hope for that last one...but it's never that easy.  

In my role, I just remember that I am part of their support system.  Lifting them up when they need it most.  Helping them know that I too struggle and will struggle for the rest of my life, hoping they see that I'm only human, I have plenty of flaws and I do well just getting through another day battling emotional eating.  I choose to be real and give them real answers to real questions.  
I do not sugar-coat anything...both literally and figuratively.  LOL!
In my position they need to know about the HARD DAYS not the days where I feel on top of the world.  The hard days are the ones that determine or success and failure.  The hard days are what make us stronger.  The easy days are there to give us hope and guidance to make it through another hard day...that's all.  The hard days make it worth the work and tears.  

Find people that with be there for the HARD DAYS too!  They will help support you when you succeed and be there to lift you up when you have failed...

Be that for someone you love.  Don't try and break them down, instead lift them up!
If you feel jealous of their healthy lifestyle, become a part of it!  Join the club!  You'll never regret it, you'll feel better and you'll be helping yourself while helping someone you love so much!
I guess I just feel for those that seem lifted up when they are working out with me, yet feel destroyed when they get around family and friends that may not see the reason for their interest in healthy living...that makes me sad.  We should ALL want our family and friends to be happy and healthy...RIGHT?!  Why is that so often NOT the case?  Ugh...

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