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Tuesday, July 15, 2014

tough day...

You might wonder why I'm sharing a personal struggle OTHER than healthy living but in reality it's a trigger.  A bump in the road would always bring an opportunity, a choice to fail or succeed with my emotional eating...it'll make more sense in a minute.

We had to say goodbye to our sweet Dixie.  Our yellow lab that was born Aug 8, 2002.  My husband and I were dating in college and his birthday request was a yellow lab puppy!  I searched until I found the perfect breeder and was able to choose from the liter.  Oh my goodness from the second I saw her, I knew she was our baby.  Her ears were as big as her head and her brothers and sisters were all piled on top of her and she was so happy!  On our way home, I stopped and picked out the BIGGEST red bow I could find, tied it loosely around her neck and we took her to meet "Daddy" for the first time!  He was SO excited! You must remember were in college...no real responsibility so these puppies changed our lives.  Training, feeding, making sure she didn't chew every item in our house.  It was FUN and eye-opening worrying about someone other than ourselves.  She was our "first child".  
As the boys grew, they shared moments with her just as we did...

 From day 1 she was OBSESSED with her "bird"...retrieving toy!  
If you showed it to her, her eyes lit up, tail wagging, barking and ready to PLAY! 

  
Years passed and she lived a life full of swimming, running, eating people food, meeting new furry friends and finding a best friend and sister in Gracie-my mom's lab mix (pictured above-left).

As to not drag things on too terribly long, Dixie was 12 years old, had some tumors and issues were arising.  She was not eating, couldn't play or run...she had become helpless.  She was skin and bones with a large belly from the tumor taking all of the blood from the rest of her body.  It was sad.  We knew the best thing for her would be to send her on to the next, happiest life to reunite with her sister, Gracie.  It was SO hard saying goodbye.  My heart aches.  Watching an animal that you loved let go of life is gut-wrenching but it was best.  She is no longer suffering.  

Why am I sharing this sad story with my Move It Momma readers? 

So you understand that in my past, moments such as these destroyed me.  
I would consume food until I made myself physically ill.  
The food would coat the emotions.  
In an odd way it helped me relax to simply gorge myself into a food coma.  Sad but true. 
Yesterday it was a mind game for me.  I had to argue with my own self to NOT give in.  

To let emotions be emotions and for food to be only FOOD.  

And I am happy to report that I kept myself in control.  Drinking water, playing with my boys and our lab, Molly really helped to ease the stress and sadness.  I focused on positive things instead of eating.  I made sure to stay clear of the kitchen at most times and KEPT BUSY.  

A huge victory-hate using that word in a time of sadness but it was knowing I am in control.
I told myself that the food was a TEMPORARY fix that would 100% leave me feeling worse than I started.  It would take me 3 steps back after working so hard to get to where I am today.
  So I cried...and cried...and cried.
It was a therapy much healthier than stuffing my face full of Oreo's and crackers.  

Life throws many obstacles, bumps, happy and sad moments our way. 
It is how we deal that makes us stronger.  
Our strength is tested in SO many ways, but we must understand that no matter what-
we are worth fighting for.  
Both happy and sad times in life make our lives greater.  
We learn from the sadness and focus on the happiness and making memories with the people that matter most.  
I will miss Dixie forever...
but I will also celebrate knowing that I did not allow this sad moment in life bring me back to the person that I used to be...





Some foods I've been enjoying lately:

1/2 c oats with 1/3 chopped peach and sprinkled cinnamon!  This took less than a minute to prepare!  NO EXCUSES!

My famous go-to berry parfait with plain Greek yogurt, fresh blueberries and TJ's high fiber O's

HUGE hit from the weekend...
I served these with turkey breakfast sausage and scrambled eggs...don't forget a little sugar-free syrup!  

Snacking on the go?
Caramel rice cake topped with crunchy PB...Mmmm, my fav!  And some fresh berries :)

Brown rice pasta lasagna!  Delicious and effortless...a great combo for my family and I!  
Served with fresh string beans that were SO yummy!

Made sure to not overcook these noodles, layered them in the Pyrex...
Topped it with diced tomatoes and sauce sauteed with browned Jenni-O breakfast sausage and 1lb lean ground turkey...combine in skillet with onion and garlic-lots of garlic, add tomato sauce, diced and juices!  Layer and between layers I added small tsp of low fat Ricotta.  A little goes a long way, so using the smallest container, I only used less than half for a large Pyrex of lasagna!  Bake at 350 until bubbly...Mmmmmm!  

2 comments:

fancy nancy said...

I'm so sorry about your dog! They really do become part of the family!!

Mama Hen said...

I am sooooo very sorry to hear about Dixie. It breaks my heart. You know we are animal lovers and I know how difficult this time is for all of you. Our animals are family members and when they depart a part of us go along with them. I am sorry my dear friend and will say a prayer for your family and beautiful dog. Big hug to you!

Mama Hen