...or lack there of?
I guess growing up overweight and living most of my life with no confidence has sort of taken its toll on me. In 2001 when I decided my life needed CHANGE, I knew that my body was changing on the outside and I felt better, but was I finally gaining self-confidence?! Hmm, unfortunately NO. I mean I always felt as though I could accomplish things, I am smart, independent and always loved to make people laugh but as far as my body image...whew, it was bad. And 10 years later with a hubby that loves me more than anything in this world, two boys that look up to their Momma, I still have low self-esteem when it comes to my body. Last night I was at a Stampin' Up party with some of my best, childhood friends and family and I found myself dogging my self-image in front of all those people. I can't explain it, but I guess I feel like I want people to know up front that I could be thinner and more "in shape" before they judge me for that? Like I wanna say what people are thinking before they say it??! Am I even making sense? Yes, I made a lifestyle change but I'd still like to become the true person that I feel like on the inside and I'm making those changes and I must admit, running has helped me TREMENDOUSLY deal with these feelings...I feel more confident getting out there and doing something I've set my mind to do! Ok, so I guess this rambling post is asking....
do you have trouble with self-confidence, self-esteem or body image?!
on a positive note, I ran today in the blazing heat...it was H.O.T outside. I know I say that everyday, but whew it was rough! But we did it, I pushed my one year old in the B.O.B stroller and my four year old rode his bike 3.2 miles! WOOHOOO! So proud of myself and those boys for getting out there and taking care of our bodies today :)